Stop and Smell the... "Roses?"

Funny how smells can trigger such vivid memories.

I was cleaning the kitchen which at the time was in desperate disarray. The smells of last night's dinner, the sticky soda syrup on the counter, even the burned skillet. All of the sudden I had a strong feeling of deja vu. You know, that feeling as if you are in another place and another time but the present brought you back?.

The time was 12 years ago, the place was my late best friend's kitchen. The dishes in the sink that had old cereal, the stove that hadn't been cleaned for days. Considering the smells that started it weren't pleasant I found it very strange that the feeling I had was.

My friend had very advanced bone cancer. He was very ill and in much pain. The reason my messy kitchen reminded me of his was because he was physically unable to clean. That moment in my memories would have more likely brought back sad emotions or even angry, but it didn't. All I could think of was I am SO glad to have had that time with him.

Sometimes certain smells, sounds, tastes and even sights can be powerfully emotional. Another smell that has brought back unpleasant memories for me is rubber. When I was a kid I had lots of surgeries. Back in those days they used a rubber mask for the anesthesia. Now as an adult I find the smell of rubber tires or anything made of rubber too strong and I gag.

I wonder how many of you can remember a moment like that. It can be anything your senses bring to the forefront and any feeling you experience. I'm curious to know how many of you have had something that sticks out in your mind.

Ten Potential Titles of Books I'd like to Write

1. The Invisible Woman That God Saw
2. The Butler is Innocent
3. When The Captive was Free
4. Just Because I Dont Care Does Not Mean I Dont Understand
5. How To Talk To People That Think Your An Idiot
6. Damn Gravity
7. 53 Things To Do While Your Stuck
8 I'd Like To Know....
9.What Can Man Do To Me?
10. The Greeting Table

Something I really dislike

I have been really annoyed lately at people who refuse to communicate yet expect you to understand what they need and want. Some people think they are being so kind by trying to gently tell you what they want or what they dont want yet by being "kind" they end up just being confusing and aggravating.

I must admit I am guilty of this alot of time and I get angry with myself when I do it however there have been alot of incidents lately where I have had people angry with me for weeks, even months because they havent told me directly that they wanted something or that I was doing something that hurt them.

The worst part is often these people are two faced and will tell you they are perfectly happy with you to your face but tell others what an "ogre" you are. I have a good heart and I love people and generally try to be a nice person but when people do this to me I feel like such a bad person. Then I get confused because I have no idea "how to be a better person" when it reality I never did anything wrong.

I cant do anything about how others will do this but I am going to try my best to change my ways of communicating so I dont do this to others and maybe perhaps feel better about myself when I am honest.

My favorite play times as a child

One of my favorite places to play when I was little was under a "great big" pine tree in our yard. My dad was a machinist so he brought home a "spool" for large wire that I would use as a table. I would play tea party and house for hours. I also loved to play teacher and would put my stuffed animals and dollies around the table.

I found this place a solace from my world of hospitals and surgerys. I could fantasize about being a mommy. Keeping my "children" happy and safe. I'd teach them how to read and spell and give them lessons on etiquette and manors.

I loved playing with the pine cones and sticks under the tree and alway felt like the tree was hiding me from everything, keeping me safe even though I could be seen from the street in the front.

I also had a life size doll house I loved to play in during my kindergarten class. They had play cups and and bowls, pots and pans that I would pretend to take care of my own beautiful house. I dont rememeber anyone ever playing with me in it so I could make it any way I wanted.

Come to think of it playing house was my favorite game.

5 Things I'd take to a deserted island

1. My bible because I'd need lots of comfort and encouragement if I was feeling so trapped and scared I"d never get back home. I'd also want to keep my heart close to the Lord to survive

2. My kitty to make sure I could take care of her.

3. My bean pillow so I could have some comfy place to lay

4. My kefty excercize things to keep limber so my legs dont hurt

5. a water filter cause you cant drink sea water

My favorite dolls growing up

Raggedy Anne and Andy were my favorite growing up. I had a Raggedy Anne on my crutch when I was little and a male friend of mine had a Raggedy Andy. We always hung out so when people saw us together they thought we were "a couple" lol. I guess that is one thing that I loved about it is that it brought smiles to peoples faces that I passed by. People often stare at me like Im kinda freaky but when I was little they couldnt help but think. CUTE. Boy are those days long gone lol.

Another of my favorite dolls was a furry stuffed puppy I called Puff. He went with me through all my surgerys and by then I had at least 10. I would feel like he was my guard dog against the doctors. It was a silly notion but when your a scared little girl it sure seemed comforting.

Mandy was a doll  that I had been looking at for months because she was beautiful. She had blonde shoulder length hair and a pretty pink night gown with lace on the bodice. I pretended she was my little girl. I had dreams of being mommy and was so trying to learn to be a good one :)

I think dolls really gave me an opportunity to dream about what I wanted to be and do when I grew up. I could be a mommy, a teacher, and a wife. Dolls were a wonderful outlet for me.

These are a few of my favorite things.

1. Dolls
2. Piano Music
3. Thomas Kinkade/Norman Rockwell Art
4. Mountains in summer
5. Rainbows
6. Gardenias
7. Sunshine
8. Warm rains
9. Jewelry
10. Good friends
11. True story movies
12. Thunder
13. Snuggles
14. Fire places
15. Sparkly things like sequins and glitter
16. The smell of real pine
17. Oceans
18.Tinsel on Christmas trees
19. Christmas
20. The smell of baking
21.Gum drops
22. Cinamon bears
23. The Waltons
24. Little House on The Prairie
25. Victorian style dresses (Cinderella style)
26. Lace
27. Snow (looking from inside out)
28. Poetry
29. Gingerbread cookies
30. Quilts